Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Just When You Thought All Was Lost, Here Comes Life

Stop the depression, cease and desist with the negative thoughts, discontinue the discomfort; halt the procrastination!
“This just in – Optimism Is Possible…..”

Last July I lost my last full time gig – this was at the beginning of the downturn before everything got really hairy – before anyone knew how bad things could really get. I had been working with a small start up with big plans and ambitions and I, as the Corporate Chef was working on things way outside my comfort level and skill set but I was learning things about building a business from the ground up that I knew, in my heart of hearts, that would pay off huge in the future – financial plans, construction project management, preopening critical paths; all that really fun stuff.
I had the feeling that something was coming my way although I hoped that things would work themselves out. I saved a bit, held out for a decent severance package and set up a few leads for consulting work should the bottom drop out.
And, drop out it did. Even though my intuition was telling me to be prepared it still came as quite a shock to me when the conversation finally came, you know how they go, ‘No hard feelings, you’ve done an excellent job, just a matter of economics…’. No matter how they framed it, it still meant that I was outside looking in.
Having planned a bit, I scheduled a long overdue back surgery; the rationalization being that I needed all my strength for the next chapter of my adventure.
For the first time in my life I filed for unemployment; no pride involved – I had paid in, I deserved the cash.
I worked my network, reaching out to past associates and co workers, polished up my Linked In profile, got on FaceBook, started my own blog – anything to work the process.
I figured that the energy I was expending would return ten fold when the perfect job I had envisioned, meditated on and wrote about would surely come.
I sent out 6 resumes a week, sure that my crafty cover letters would woo some hard hearted Human Resources Director to my cause; I could be an valued asset to their organization after all – couldn’t they see that?
My smiles became more strained, my posts in my gratitude journal started to sound more like pleas and I slowly realized that I had become very bitter over my past dismissal.
Very bitter, and with that the depression hit me in the head like an empty Tequila bottle after eating the worm. The depression lay there simmering under the surface mixing with my bitterness until it became a lethal brew, enough to knock any wise ass to his knees; and there I remained, prostrate wondering at once how the hell I had gotten here, and where, o where, would I end up?
And that’s when I woke up from my fog and got back up on my feet. I straightened my shoulders and raised my head up because I knew that no one, no one was going to make this work except for me and the first step was to let it go; release and allow, change my stinkin’ thinkin’ and get myself out there.
The minute, I mean literally the moment when I let go of my feelings of bitterness over my last job and my desperation over my present predicament I got a call. I went on an interview for a Kitchen Manager position, under my pay grade but who was I to turn my nose up at a decent day’s work.
My can do attitude, that attitude of gratitude came shining through me and was told that instead of the KM position they wanted to offer me the GM position.
I already had more than most to be grateful for, a roof over my head, my body was healing nicely, my children were healthy – my word, what did I have to complain or worry about? Can’t seem to remember right now………
GM, well hell yes; praise God and pass the ammunition; time to roll up my sleeves and starting hittin’ it hard – tall and frosty, here I come.
Now, I ask you – what came first, the chicken or the egg?
What are you capable of with a heart full of gratitude and a head full of optimism?
Hold True my very dear friends -any of you who may be experiencing difficultes at this time - Hold True, night always passes into the light of a brand new day and who knows what thay may bring....

1 comment:

  1. Fantastic! I know you'll rock. Keep the end goal in sight & try not to sweat the small stuff. They're going to love you.
    This really is some crazy adventure,eh? It's just as easy to believe that all paths we end up walking are the right ones -no matter how painful they can be. I've decided to join you in focusing on being grateful & simply living with a bent towards believing dreams are attainable. Really, what is the alternative? I struggle daily but there are times it flows. It's awfully nice to have you light a candle for the rest of us.